I need your skis, your boots and your motorcycle.

Today I arrived in Kelowna. I had booked a bus trip that went overnight, my thinking being that I'd save on a night of accommodation, but that really didn't work out as I ended up booking another night in Vancouver so I could sleep during the afternoon.

During my wait at the bus station I was asked for money by three different homeless people. I gave them a few energy bars and some lose change. I asked the security guard why there are so many homeless people in Vancouver. He said that they wanted to be homeless.

In all fairness Vancouver is a pretty cool city, it's just that all of that is tainted by a massive social issue that it seems to be ignoring.

When my bus finally arrived at midnight I attempted to have several sessions of interrupted sleep. Occasionally I'd wake up as the entire bus shuddered and groaned. I realised this was the sound of the bus losing control on the ice. During these times I took the opportunity to look out at the night scenery which resembled something from a Stephen King novel.

Kelowna (pronounced Key-low-nah) is the type of place you'd expect to see a Cohen Brother's film set. It's a completely flat city surrounded by hills with a population of about 100,000. Every second person drives a pickup truck. Basically it's what Townsville would look like if it were within missile range of the Arctic circle.

When I arrived in Kelowna I began my mission to find myself all the necessary ski equipment I would require for my skiing adventures. I got some good deals on my skis, boots and jackets etc as all the stores are currently having a "Spring Sale".

I also bought a really good pair of socks. Good socks are very important. They're called Kodiak Mountaineer socks. They're made from real Kodiak Bears, so you know they're good.

Vancouver: City of Dreams

Today I caught a sight seeing bus tour of Vancouver. It was mostly a waste of time since it was raining and I couldn't sit on the the open top part of the bus. As a result I didn't really see much. But I did get to see a steam powered clock which was neat. I also stopped at the theatre where Bryan Adams played his first gig.

The original theatre burnt down but when they rebuilt it they erected a memorial to Bryan Adams' career. I asked one of the other passengers to take a photo of me but then a homeless guy asked me for money. I gave him a couple of quarters and some penny's. I think it was Bryan Adams.

I ended up mostly taking photos of homeless people since the city doesn't appear to have any real sights and I've never really seen this many homeless people before. I saw one guy carrying all his possessions in a supermarket trolley and a woman sleeping under a bridge. It's like a Bruce Springsteen video clip.

Vancouver City Limits: Part 2

Today I was propositioned by a prostitute for the first time. I said no but it was nice that she asked. I think she was homeless.

Vancouver has a lot of homless people. It's kind of a big problem, so the city built a really big park that they could all sleep in. It's called Stanely Park. It's one of the world's biggest inner city parks, but not as big as Central Park in New York. New York has more homless people.

The people in Vancouver all have really nice haircuts. A homeless guy asked me for change and I thought "nice haircut". I'm not sure where they get their hair cut but they must be good.

Vancouver is a very multi-cultural city. There are a lot of Asians. For some reason all the Asian men in Vancouver dress like gay stereotypes. Even the straight ones.

I was in a food court today and everyone around me was Asian except for the girl next to me who I think was a Chi-negro. All the food stalls were run by Asian people except for the Chinese food store. That was run by a white dude wearing a trucker's hat.

I went to the Vancouver Public Library. That library has got it going on. The architecture of the place is pretty amazing. It's a big cylinder. I wandered around until I eventually picked up Tom Arnold's autobiography in the parapsychology section (?). The dust jacket said his upcoming projects include Cradle 2 The Grave and True Lies 2. Over the loud speaker it was announced that the library would close soon and I promptly left.